Disappointment, is something that happens to me all the time. Yesterday, happened again. Wasted 3 hours(well in the end still got bball a bit la, not really wasted) waiting for cca performance. Its heartbreaking, to know that i cant even be compared to a junior. Too bad theres not enough space? Too bad the two selected people are good friends? Yes, too bad, just too bad for me.
Too bad there wasnt enough space at the stage? Its really irritating, i dont understand. And difficult too, having to put on a brave front when u feel like maybe crying? This is about the forth time i am being used as a replacement. And i have to act like i know yes yes, no space, i not good enuf, so let others, i be reserve. Everyone is happily preparing, and i am the only one there sitting there, watching everything move, and i am just stuck there.
Is it really going to be like that, me being stuck there forever, never being able to move one or advance, while everyone goes ahead of me? No one will understand how disappointed i felt. So, i chose to get out of there, like what Christon said, good advice say, zao lo, since no one lookin n no one noticing. Went over to R1, yeh maybe cheered up a bit, cuz got a good friend there, someone who i can always share my troubles with, someone who really treats me like a friend, not a tool for homework. Yea went to the bball court and shit, his daughter came. I dont want say la, nvm. Eventually everyone zao, and went to the fitness station do a bit of slacking there.
So how? Act la. Go home then is like, no mood do this, no mood do that, so tiring having to act as though nothing happened in front of everyone, i dont mind, and all the stuff. Tired, want to rest and never continue again.